Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Conversations With Food Service Trainees

"I'll have the special." I considered this a simple request.

"What is the special?" said the new guy behind the counter.

"Nachos Grande," I replied. "With rice and beans."

He looked a bit confused, but dutifully started filling a to go container with chips. "You want beans?"

"A little."


"No, who puts rice on nachos?" The confused look returned and he reached up to look at the sign that advertised the special.

"It says with beans and rice," he said.

"I think that means it comes with beans and rice on the side, like, in addition to the Nachos Grande."


"Because how grande could the nachos be if they only came with rice and beans? I mean, you've got beef and chicken and pork here, and pico de gallo and guac and sour cream and I want that stuff on the nachos."

I might as well be discussing astrophysics with a mule.

"So you want carne?


"Okay, that's extra."

"Why is it extra?"

"Because it says...the sign says...only rice and beans."

It was at this point I suggested he ask someone else, because we were clearly going to do this circle dance for several more minutes, perhaps indefinitely, if we didn't get outside intervention. A seasoned vet walked by and, after brief consultation, it was determined that yes, the nachos grande comes with anything I want and the rice and beans are on the side. So I'm telling the New Guy all I want on it and he's perplexed and I'm excited I'm gonna get to eat and both of us are so distracted by our various emotions that it's not until the chips are piled high with all manner of fatty goodness when I realize he's forgotten something. The nacho cheese.

I point it out. A silent beat passes. Again, he looks at the sign. Finally, he turns to a co-worker and says, "Is cheese extra on the nachos?"


At 2:36 PM, Blogger Betty Underground said...

It is almost like that time you tried to exchange the video game - but different.

THAT was funny, Joe Speaker.

At 1:10 PM, Blogger KajaPoker said...

Cheese is always extra, isn't it?

At 8:41 AM, Blogger Irongirl01 said...

too too funny Joe...

I had a Best Buy experience where the cashier (dumb as a box of rocks) couldnt figure out to just give me $$$ back instead of the $$$ and odd cents. when I gave her exact change after she had put in just the bills . She was like but the register only says you get this back... DUH

Remember some people are only capable of doing simple things and fast food isnt fast food anymore


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