Sunday, February 06, 2005


I have a buddy who is prone to flying off the handle at any time, on any subject, in unpredictable circumstances. As such, we nicknamed him after the "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" character in the title.

I'm THIS close to going "Cheswick."


Welcome to my poker hiatus.

I will not bore you with the deatils. It is nearly impossible for me to relate the implausibility of the suckouts I have endured this weekend. The one thing you can count on is that it happened with malicious consistency. Time and time again.

On the positive side, I played well. Timely folds and pushing my big hands when I'm ahead. Only to get sucker punched. It is scarcely solice, however.

Sure, there's the need to maintain an emotional balance, to not let the suckouts affect your play. I think I've done a good job of that. But when it's going against you, I'm a firm believer you need to step back. I arrived at that conclusion based on past experience where I didn't do exactly that. And it hurt the 'roll.

The worst part, to me, is having to sit around for a few days with the bitter taste that comes with dropping a chunk of cash. Re-playing the hands and wishing for a different conclusion. The only real salve for that is to win. And, I guess, time.

It's part of the gig. I know that. Doesn't make it any easier to take. I've maintained a positive outlook on it. Until now.

The task now is, to turn it BACK into a positive before I play again. Right now, I feel like if I absorb another bad beat, I might just empty all my online accouunts. In fact, in the wake of the most recent beat (that would be my pre-flop all-in with AA losing to K10o when a four-on-the-board flush materialized, making me, yet again, Bubble Boy), I pondered just that. An emotional reaction, to be sure.

Ultimately, I don't want to do that. I do need to step back, re-evaluate my play (who knows, maybe it HAS affected me) and head back in in the right frame of mind.

Keep a good thought, can ya? And I apologize in advance for what promises to be a week of dour introspection in this space.


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