Friday, August 18, 2006

AimK

I want these motherfucking ants out of my motherfucking kitchen!

It's not quite "Snakes on a Plane," but this is Real Life, people, not some fictional tour de force of multi-layered screenwriting and Oscar-worthy performances. I'm attentive to the smallest scrap of food being left out because of common desert infestation by these pests and last night, I could not find a single crumb they might have been after. Perhaps they cleaned me out before I got home, but I prefer to believe they just decided to hang at my pad due to its inherent "cool factor." Flattered though I was, I still massacred them in droves, ensuring an above the fold mention in today's ant newspapers.

Aside from serial antocide, I spent a quiet evening at home watching my recently-purchased DVDs of "The Shield" Season 1. Wow. What a conflicted anti-hero in Vic Mackey and Chiklis owns it. Great character, great show. I missed quite a few programs like this during my married/poker fugue and have been really enjoying catching up on some of them in my limited free time.

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Interesting theory advanced by a colleague on this Jon Benet fiasco. The guy is undoubtedly creepy and likely has an illegal and inappropriate past, but his story just doesn't ring true in this particular instance. So what's his motive? Fame, perhaps, but a more concrete reason to confess would be to get the hell out of Thailand. You want to do time as a sex offender there or here? Thought so.

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I played an $11 Double Shootout to the Stars Sunday Million last night and was out in 6th at my table. I saw a free flop in the BB with Ks8s and was delighted to see it come 988 rainbow. I check-raised two douchebags a healthy amount--pot bet, call, raise 4x--and one called. Turn was 5d, second diamond and I bet the pot. Call. River was 2d and I pushed my remaining 500 into 2K. Call. 7d3d for runner-runner flush.

Worst flop call ever? You decide. I decided I wouldn't play any more poker last night.

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For no reason other than I want to, here are the top 5 greatest books ever about baseball. If you're a baseball fan and haven't read all five, kill youself. Or read 'em. Whatever.

1. The Boys of Summer
2. Ball Four
3. Moneyball
4. Bronx Zoo
5. I'll go ahead and leave #5 blank and you can submit your own. The top four are unassailable, but now there's room for debate. I'm partial to "The Moustache Gang," an examination of the A's in the early 70s, partly because it was one of the first books I ever remember reading. "Men at Work," by George Will was a seminal work at the time, but seems dated now. Halberstam's got some good stuff, but, if pressed, I suppose I'd go with "Wild, High and Tight: the Life and Death of Billy Martin," which is just a fascinating examination of the combative SOB and includes keen insight into why Steinbrenner is a complete sociopath.

Thus ends our broadcast day.

16 Comments:

At 11:21 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Since there was no mention of fiction or non fiction:
Summerland by Michael Chabon,

 
At 11:30 AM, Blogger Daddy said...

You've listed some dandies, and I've read them all, save for the mustachioed A's.

I could list any number of books here, but I'll just leave the one.

No list is complete without Lawrence Ritter's "The Glory of Their Times."

 
At 11:33 AM, Blogger Daddy said...

And to leave off Bill James' Historical Abstract is pure heresy.

 
At 11:36 AM, Blogger Todd said...

If you're a big fan of multiple writers, I suggest "The Armchair Book of Baseball", a collection of articles and essays about baseball. It has the best baseball article I've ever read, the story of Bruce Gardner, a pre-bonus baby pitcher who passed on a big contract out of high school, ended up hurting his arm, and blowing his brains out.

Another great book is "Good Enough to Dream" by Roger Kahn. You follow him as he acts as GM for a Class-A independent team for a season. Great behind-the-scenes stuff about the minors.

 
At 11:45 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Summerland" - Michael Chabon is one of the strangest books stitched around a baseball theme. Has one of the best quotes about baseball which, of course, escapes me at the moment.

Doh... guess I should have read the comments before commenting. I see that Mr./Ms. Anonymous beat me to the punch on that one...

 
At 12:16 PM, Blogger BadBlood said...

There have been many a day as a youth where I couldn't put down...

The Baseball Encyclopedia.

But I've always been a numbers guy.

 
At 12:25 PM, Blogger Jordan said...

Not much help on the baseball thing, but enjoy the Shield. I was flipping through the channels one night, when I saw two cops enter into a small house. A dead old Asian lady was on the floor and he old husband was tied up. The cops untied him and as they looked at the lady, he reached into a drawer, grabbed a gun and spread his brains all over the wall. The visuals on that show are amazing, and the storytelling and acting are top notch. Enjoy! And while you are at it, I just started watching Rescue Me on DVD starting from Season 1. It's the perfect follow-up when you are done with the Shield.

 
At 12:59 PM, Blogger CJ said...

You're about to be hooked on one of TV's best shows. Season 1 is just a taste of what's to come. Season 4 was my favorite, although the most recent, Season 5, kicked ass, too.

 
At 1:07 PM, Blogger StB said...

Read Catcher in the Wry by Bob Uecker. You may pee yourself.

 
At 1:55 PM, Blogger Todd said...

Well, if you want to count "Catcher in the Wry" (the Bob Uecker Fan Club narrative is very funny), then you should also check out "The Umpire Strikes Back" by Ron Luciano.

Geez, I guess I've read a few baseball books....

 
At 2:48 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

this might be the first time I felt compelled to comment on two posts in a row. That means you're doing your job, Fredgar.

Your baseball books couldn't be topped (especially since I loaned you the Billy Martin book) I would also, like Daddy, to push "Glory of Their Times"

And since I am the ultimate authority on the best TV shows ever, you simply must rent "The Sopranos" in order from beginning to end and "Deadwood". If you do that, (with proof) then I will go for the "Shield" for my next Netflix queue.

Al Swearengen rules!

Sincerely, Dan Dority

 
At 5:42 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have to say I am way behind on baseball books, but if you have never read it The Universal Baseball Association, Inc., J. Henry Waugh, Prop. By Robert Coover is just great. It is about a guy that has created his own fantasy league. It was written in 1968 I think so it was before every one had their own fantasy team. Great read.

On the TV series. I would definately second watching every episode of "The Sopronos". I just got done doing so a couple of days ago. Thanks to the donks at Blockbuster online sending me disk 3 before disk 2 a couple times it took a bit longer than it should. I am starting to get over that, finally.

pdx_David

 
At 9:55 PM, Blogger Kelsgarden said...

http://www.pesticide.org/ants.html

ok - the ants must go, but you are going to have to work for it -

 
At 7:38 AM, Blogger Human Head said...

The Shield just may be the greatest cop drama EVER.

I always flip flop between that and Stephen Bochco's gem, the hard-as-nails Cop Rock.

 
At 7:40 PM, Blogger jremotigue said...

OK, three books:
Ted Williams - The Science of Hitting

Ring Around the Bases: The Complete Baseball Stories of Ring Lardner

Jeffrey Lyons - Out of Left Field (for useless baseball information)

 
At 6:19 AM, Blogger Pokerwolf said...

If you want a cheap way to keep ants out of your place, then get some white vinegar and put some on a sponge. Wipe the areas you've found ants, and the baseboards around there) and it should help the problem. For whatever reason, ants HATE vinegar. It may take a few applications, but it'll help.

If you haven't read, Baseball Between the Numbers, I'd highly reccomend it.

 

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