It's Always One

7:14 p.m.: Alright, we'll see how this goes. I don't want to over-saturate the market with my drunken Re-Buy ramblings, but since I've had top finishes the last two times I've kept thsi running diary, I'm gonna go back to the well.

Getting ready to start. I'm gonna keep an eye on The Poker Nerd, as well.

7:16: Tonight's beverage of choice is Bass Ale.

7:19: Six hands contested already and not a single all-in. Tight group.

7:22: AA for Daddy. Three called my pre-flop raise. None my flop bet. Flop was ten-high, but with two-diamonds, and considering I'm 1-3 with aces today, I saw no need to bet anything less than the pot there. Chasing costs.

7:25: Pocket 8s are good when the flush doesn't come. He chased for all it was worth, though.

7:26: We have our first pre-flop all-in, which nets a fine haul of 30 chips. Well-played, sir. Well played.

7:27: Enter Beer #2. At 12 minutes per beer, I'll be dead by Level 15.

7:31: Okay, I'm not gonna fall in love with this little move, but I've limped with the previously mentioned 8s and just did it again with 9s. Flop was 532 rainbow and I bet the pot. One caller. Ax looking for the straight, I guess. He check-called a pot-sized bet on the turn (a King, which gave me momentary pause) and we check-checked the rag river. He had J3o. Well played, sir. Well-played.

That's over a thousand chips I've picked up in those two hands.

7:35: Yikes. The All-In Donkey on my table just pushed again pre-flop (third-time) and I had to call with Big Slick. He's got Kings. Of course I flopped the ace.

That's the kinda crap that usually happens to me.

7:42: Re-Buy count for All-In Monkey is 6.

7:45: I just got moved. A LOT more chips at this table, though I still have second-highest.

7:45: Nerd Alert! Last time, I promise. Hasn't had much to play apparently. Couple hundred below starting stack.

7:56: Question: During the Re-Buy period, with the board reading 66899, you have pocket 9s and it's checked to you. What is your value bet into a 1200 pot?

This guy went ahead and pushed in his whole 5K. And got called by pocket tens. Now THAT'S a value bet in the re-buy period. Pocket tens had 13K three minutes ago. He just did a double re-buy.

7:59: Back-to-back Hammers. I didn't play 'em. Woulda flopped two-pair on the second. I hang my head in shame.

8:01: It's officially dumb at this table. Four pre-flop all-ins. AJ, AQ, 88, 77. I folded 55. Guess what woulda won? Yep, fives, with a straight.

8:03: Lotta folding by me. This gives me an opportunity to tell you I reached another final table today. I finished 9th (of 142) in the $20 PLO this morning. Was 5th in chips when we hit the FT and got AsAh5s7h in the BB. Five limpers and I bet the pot, which was 10K (blinds at 1000/2000). Only the chip leader called. He didn't have much of a chip lead. Less than 10K more than I, in fact.

ANYWAY, the flop came 7s4c2h. I like that flop and push in my remaining 7500. He calls with Tc9c7c7h.

!#$!%%%#%^%&%^#^*%#&$%@$#$!!#@#!@

But I have re-draws. Two aces, 4 threes and back-door flush draw. I got none. In fact, he caught runner-runner clubs for the flush.

So, the question I have, considering my relative inexperience with PLO, was that a good call by him? I wouldn't call with that hand. But, as I say, I don't know. I know it's a post-flop game and he has straight and flush action, but it was a BIG raise. Late.

8:10: Ugh. I'm making bad decisions about when to play. I fold ATo to an all-in and a call and would have won about 6K. I play my KsTs, see a flop of KJJ, continue to call bets and make runner-runner flush only to lose to Axs. I should have bet it harder earlier and woulda, but for the jacks. At least I didn't raise on the river, so I saved my passive ass the rest of my stack.

8:12: Down to 3555 from 6800.

8:13: This late, I'm willing to gamble with my 3555. I lose, it costs me $20 to have just slightly less.

8:15: As I do against the table nit-wit. In the CO, I call his, oh, I dunno, eigth straight all-in with A2o. I woulda won, too, except for the pocket Aces held by the button.

8:15: So, I quickly re-buy, but not quickly enough, since I only get 1500 back before the hand is dealt. Same jackass (who managed to get both his re-buys) pushes AGAIN. I call with my JJ, as does AA from the previous hand. Jacks are ahead to TT and K4s and I triple up my 1500. Since I did "add-on" when I still only had 1500, I have 8150 (just below average) heading to the second hour (with the 200 add-on). In for $51.

El Nerdo de Poker sitting at 7755. No additional re-buys as far as I know.

Prize pool is a whopping $55,350. 135 places paid. I'm 395 of 1035 remaining (1428 began).

8:30: BOOOO-YA! That's right, I said "Boo-Ya!" Pocket kings and my raise is called by the Re-Buy Period Push Monkey. Flop comes JT7 rainbow and he check-raises me all-in. I pause. It's quite within the realm he has JT or Q9, or even J7 or 98. A lot of people push with any two late in the re-buy to try to accumulate, but this guy was ridiculous, leading me to believe he just plain sucks. And people who just plain suck have been eating my fucking lunch lately.

Regardless, I have to call. He shows a relatively frightening J8 for top pair and gunshot. Nine outs twice. He fails to get any. T13K. I was right about him just plain sucking, however.

8:38: Here's another question: I have mad respect at this table. Only a Lemur or someone with a huge hand is gonna call my raises. So, how do I get action if I want it? Lower my raises? Limp? (Ugh)

Right now, the blinds are only 75/150, so stealing (which would be my natural inclination) isn't really a lucrative option.

8:41: Hammer count now at 4.

8:44: Well, in regard to the most recent question, I'm folding so dang much that once the antes kick in, I'll start to pick up some chips with raises.

8:45: Down to 826. The Nerd is not one of them. I dunno what happened, but, considering his ability, I'll wager on bad cards and/or EEEEEEEEE-AWWWWWWWWWW.

8:47: Cue Aretha Franklin. QQ in the SB. A 3x raise from the CO and I bump it to 9x. Fold.

Now, the question is, what was he playing? A blatant steal? Then easy fold. Ax? Again, an easy fold, but I'm gonna guess Ax calls that re-raise 7 of 10 times, at least among the denizens with whom I usually consort around here. AK? An easy call, but perhaps not a +EV situation due to the lack of reverse implied odds. I think probably A9-A7. Solid open-raise hands in the CO and a solid fold, as well.

8:57: This is getting silly. I check with A9o in the BB. Flop is A87 and I bet 3/4 of the pot. All folds. Time to play the Hammer.

9:05: I played it all wrong, but I profitted more by doing so. 99 in the BB and I call a 3.5x raise. Flop is Qxx with two spades and I check (mistake #1). Raiser checks, as well. Turn is 9c, giving me a set and putting a second club on the board. I bet 3/4 the pot and he calls. My first thought is that he picked up a club draw with AK-AT. So when the three of clubs falls on the river, I check. He pushes his final 3500 in. It's almost a 9000 pot and...well...I'm not good enough to lay down my set. I call and he shows AKo.

9:10: Just gave back 1400. Open-raised with 33 in MP. And called a min. re-raise. Implied odds, you know. Flop missed me and I check-folded.

Stack at 17575. Above average. 170 of 585.

9:21: Well, back to Square One. After a lot of folding, I raise the BB from the SB and he calls. I have A2o and the flop comes K72 (wish I was hammerin'). I make a coninuation bet and he raises me into a fold. Back to 13000, after sniffing the heights of 19000.

But really, I ain't gonna win this thing sitting around and waiting for AA.

9:24: It's been a long time since I went on a rush of cards in one of these tourneys. I get some momentum--and chips--but then watch 30 hands of 74o. Perfectly illustrated above. I make a nice score and sit around doing nothing for a half-hour. When I do act, I drop chips. Is this a case of me seeing Ax and thinking it's the nuts because of the endless procession of garbage? Not in this particular instance, but overall?

9:34: I'm glad I didn't fold. Kournikova UTG and I min. raise (per Jesus. Ferguson, not Baby). MP call (who's short and gambling) and BB AQx flop. Checks all around. Rag, though second club, turn. Checks all around. Third club on the River and a min. bet from BB. 600 into a 4800 pot. I can't fold. Even if I'm beat, I can't. I don't. MP folds and BB shows JJ. Gotta be more agressive with that JJ, bud. A pre-flop re-raise gets me out, I'll tell you that.

9:39: Just cracked my 5th Bass (12 minutes per beer didn't exactly stay the course) and I'm not even buzzed. The Diary is suffering.

9:40: Pretty evenly matched at my table. I am the median, four above, four below with a range from 27K to 4600. I have 15K+.

9:44: Just witnessed the rarely seen suck, re-suck, re-re-suck. J9 v. 88 all-in preflop. Jack on the flop. 8 on the turn. Fourth diamond on the river to give J9 the flush.

The two of them are talking it over as we speak. Not in convivial tones, I might add.

9:46: I'm managing to steal once per orbit, but I'm devoid of cards. Winning pots, but not really getting anywhere.

9:48: So rigged. SB puts short-stack BB all-in. A4s for the former, A3s for the latter. Flop has a 4 and BB is headed for the door. Turn 5. River 2.

Which I'm okay with, since the BB has been overly agressive since he arrived and with less than 10x the BB, he's one to target.

10:06: Head. Meet water. As in barely keeping it above. I'm reduced to blatant steals (as in a recent one with The Jackhammer). I can hardly get cards that add up to ten.

10:08: Um, forget what I said. TT in the CO and I push over the top of a UTG raise. He calls with 88 and I am in the clover. Still slightly below average with 27K, but back in the mix.

10:14: Well, that was fun. I get moved to a new table. Very first hand, I get 44 in the BB. Big Stack raises on the button and I push. He has QQ.

Game over. 238.

!#$!%$#^&@$^**(*$&@!%#$#!##$@

You know, I hate myself. I figured a button steal, which I do WAY too often. Let's not forget I have NO read on this table since I just got here. And what bothers me most is almost three hours of solid play thrown away with stupidity. I'm not nearly pot committed and I've got plenty of chips. Just awful. There's no other way to describe it. To push all your chips in hoping for a fold or a coin flip...

Leak.

I am finally drunk, though. Which just makes me wanna play on. That's the worst part, isn't it? Whaddya mean it's over? I wanna play! I've not yet read or heard a perfect description of the feeling one gets when bombing out of a tournament. Otis probably wrote one, but I missed it. Not that Otis bombs out of tournaments, but he's the likely contender for being able to relate it.

The key for a writer is his ability to "take you there."

Um, I'm gonna go ahead and stop this before it hits drunken-philosophical-I-LOVE-YOU-GUYS territory. This isn't "We Are the World."

Oh, and by the way, this decision has absolutely nothing to do with the fact AJ keeps shoving things up my nose, disrupting both my train of thought and my ability to breathe. Nothing at all.