If I Posted Conversations With Random People Omitting the Other Half in the Inimitable Style of April

Hi.

What's new?

Not much. Same ol', same ol'.

No, I haven't.

I can't.

I just finished something I started nearly a year ago and entered it in a competition.

Yes, I still hate people. And am starting to be suspicious of capitalism.

176 pounds. Lean and mean. Biceps like tomahawks.

The camera adds ten inches.

Dutch field hockey players are my new screen saver.

No, the women's team.

I'm going to a NASCAR race next week.

Of course I'm going to bet on it.

Is it fucking December yet?