Wednesday, February 01, 2006


I missed DrPauly Appreciation Weekend. I tried to contribute something, but was of such a mind where creativity and positivity was impossible. Though I loathe being late for anything, I'll make an exception here. Thanks to my taking a Mental Health Day off from work and a full slate of MTTs, I give you my live blogging of the $4.5K on Full Tilt. I could stand to get out of my own head for a while and I can think of no better reason than to appreciate Pauly, who has been such a huge benefactor of my writing.

8:20 a.m.: Forty minutes to post. A HUGE overlay currently.

8:21: I feel a little disengeuous about the whole hiatus thing. I have rarely shied away from personal matters here, partly because I have no shame, but mostly because that's how I envisioned this forum when I began. I'm an open book in the most trying of times, but presently, circumstances are a little too rough, emotions a little too raw to air them here. It will all come out in the end, I'm sure, but right now I'm not on solid enough ground to tell it. If I felt it would help--me or anybody else--I'd not hesitate to relate the details. But conditions are currently so tenuous, so fluid, that everything I put down--and trust me, there's been plenty--is jumbled and illogical and overly emotional and of no assistance to anyone, though it may be in the future. The pain I'm feeling colors every waking thought. I sometimes feel like my body just might wad up and blow away, so flimsy is my hold on the life I cherish. I do know one thing, though. Make it two. I know I will do everything in my power to fix it and that, regardless of the outcome, I will be a better man for the experience. And c) things always look--and feel--better in the light of day than they do at 5 a.m. when you've been up all night twitching and groaning and generally feeling like someone's squeezing your insides with a garlic press. And IV, I have awesome friends.

8:38: Is it too early to start drinking?

8:41: From the Breaking News Dept.: Ryan cashed again at the LAPC. And water is wet.

8:44: Here's a recent event I can relate that put me on massive tilt. Twice in the past 10 days, I was awakened by an early morning phone call by what I presume was a collection agency. The first time, I stated that nobody of that name lived here. I repeated it the second time, but the collector was a little more persistent and the tumblers clicked into place. I didn't recognize the name because they were pronouncing it wrong, making it would like a female Caucasian rather than a French Canadian male. The calls were for the second (and now ex-) husband of my ex-wife. I was somehow listed on the account as a "relative." I don't know how or why since the wily $8-an-hour refused to divulge any further information in this "legal matter." My attempts to contact my ex-wife were futile; the two-year-old phone number I dug up is disconnected. I did check my credit report and found nothing out of the ordinary. For now.

8:50: The more I think about it, I decree it's NOT too early to start drinking. I'm still gonna resist, but the rest of you can feel free.

8:53: One of the problems I had writing my novel (still in progress) was not being able to connect with the protagonist at times, usually the ones where he was going though a difficult period in the story. That has not been a problem lately. The dear and patient wife was mighty pissed I shut down the blog, as she is as big a supporter of my writing as any, until I assured her I banged out about 10K words in the novel without even breaking a sweat. Misery is my creative co-pilot.

8:57:: My game has been teh suck lately. For one, I haven't played hardly at all. When I have played, I've been so card dead as to be comatose. I haven't been able to find the right spots for aggression and tight-weak is no way to go through life, son. I'm tight in the best of times, but you need to show some marginal hands to get action and I haven't even been able to get those. I somehow made it into the third hour of the $16K on Sunday night despite having just a single pocket pair the entire time (and it was 33). I went 1-3 in races, sucked out once and ultimately trapped an overly-aggressive AKo into putting all his chips in on the turn with only 8 outs. Yes, he caught one. I would have been above par for the first time all night. I will now transfer everyone a dollar.

8:59: Good news: Gisele Budchen is on my TV. Bad news: So is Jimmy Fallon.

9:00: Cards in the virtual air. 204 runners. $4896 prize pool. 27 paid. No overlay.

9:00: Rabbits.

9:01: I fold 76o UTG. Good fold.

9:03: Time for some Arena Rock. First up, Tesla.

9:06: It bears mentioning I'm working on zero hours sleep. Zero minutes, too. It also bears mentioning that people who call off their tournament in Level One with second pair-queen kicker amuse me. Moreso when they call it off to me, which was not the case here.

9:09: One orbit in the books. I remain nothing but a spectator. Two bust-outs already at my table.

9:10: Button open-raise with A8o is met with resistance from the ultra-aggressive SB, who min. raises and the BB who makes it 450 to go. I fold. Ace flops and BB finally lets go of his big pocket pair on the river. I don't get to see SB's kicker.

9:13: Guy on my immediate left calls a lot of pre-flop raises and is not shy about betting big out of position. Definite trap possibilities. You know, like the one the guy on my right just ran on him.

9:17: AJo (gold!) gets the blinds.

9:19: Guy on my left will lay down a hand if you bet into him. He min. raised from UTG and I called with A4s. I bet out on KT2 flop and took it down.

9:25: It's official: Poker hates me. Big Slick on a Kxx flop and KJ--who called pre-flop raise out of position--check-pushes. J on the river. T305.

9:27: AJo (gold!) gets blinds.

9:30: Walk in the BB is appreciated. T380. I've been in worse shape than this before. I don't even think I need the Angry Monkey yet.

9:34: The pocket pair drought shows no signs of abating, though I have had hands to play today, so that's something.

9:39: Comical. Free flop in the BB with Q7. Comes down AQ7 and all the money goes in. Up against AJ and AK. Five on the turn. Five on the river. IGHN.

9:40: Well, that wasn't quite what I had in mind when I wanted to get out of my head for a while as far as the brevity of the experience and two river suckouts. Though tilt is something I can manage quite well at present since, relatively speaking, it doesn't matter in the slightest. Anyway, there's my contribution. Thanks, Doc.


At 2:20 PM, Blogger Falstaff said...

5:20 PM - Glad you're back. Remember that not only will you be a better person when you're done, you'll also have some stories from it. You might not want them, but you'll have them. Look at all the mileage BG is getting out of his blown-out butthole!

5:21 PM - it's never too early to start drinking.

5:22 PM - Welcome home.

At 4:25 PM, Blogger CJ said...

That feels like every tourney I've played the last week... ugh.

At 6:42 PM, Blogger StB said...

Nice to see you are back Joe. Just a matter of time before you are on the horse and riding again.

At 10:57 AM, Blogger Drizztdj said...

Count on some drinking and playing tonight if you're up for it.

I'll be up all night and will run a tourney with ya (even if its NLHE) ;)

At 11:10 AM, Blogger BSN said...

Good to have you back. And don't feel like WE have to know what's going on; you're entitled to your privacy.

But, we're here if needed, and yeah, that feeling sucks.


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