Sideout

WEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've been utterly single-minded of purpose today and trust me when I say it is not a subject I would wish on my worst enemy. Just hours and hours of roiling the same stupid bullshit around in my head. Back and forth, back and forth with no decision in sight.

ENOUGH!

I was gonna be funny here today. I was gonna be breezy. I was gonna talk about the WPBT Fashion Review Show tonight on E! I was gonna talk about Liverpool holding Chelsea at Stamford Bridge. I was gonna talk about how a guy allowed me to suck out on him in the Stars $20 MTT last night when he slow-played his flopped set of Kings (I held QQ in the BB, checked around on the KJx flop; free turn card was a ten that gave me the OESD and paid very little--in relation to the pot size--to see the Ace on the river). I...er...guess I AM talking about those things. Let's move on.

I made another (minor) money cash in that tourney despite being card dead for 6 levels. You ever notice how when you never play any hands, you can steal like a fox on an attentive table? Only thing that kept me alive. I played tight/weak poker last night, odd considering I hadn't been doing a lot of that lately. Musta blown my aggressive wad in the WPBT satellite.

I did have one guy suck out on me huge in Level 2 when his AJ out-drew my Big Slick. I was down to T400. Not good. Not good at all. That same dickwad--directly to my left--proceeded to call EVERY. SINGLE. ONE. of my pre-flop raises after that. There were four of them. I won them all and by the first break, had more chips than he. I also watched him almost triple up just before being moved from our table. I followed, to see how his maniacal play would go during the second hour. Er, make that 15 minutes.

I ask you, what kind of blithering jackass commits his entire 10K stack with only the blinds (100/200) at stake. That's what he did, pushing on the button with 66. He got called by the SB with AA. The SB had him covered.

Had a good laugh over that one.

I was down to 4x the BB after posting it midway through the third hour. Button raised and I pushed with A4 of hearts. He had J8 of hearts. and flopped two pair. As Glyph said, "Classic big stack play, push and suck out on the small stacks." I finished 52 of 680.

Anyway, enough hands.

In Pauly's comprehensive write-up of the WPBT satellite, I was outed. And I quote, might be the best-dressed poker blogger according to fashion experts Felicia Lee and Joan Rivers.

I had to laugh. Um, guilty? It is a fact that I spend way more time on my wardrobe than a vast majority of the heterosexual male population. I guess they coined a phrase for it--metrosexual--but I was metro before metro was cool, baby. Wait, it's not cool? Fuck.

I was trying to figure out how I acquired this personality quirk and have come to the conclusion that I've always had it. My mother likes to tell the story about how, as a 5-year-old, I would pull all my clothes out of my dresser in the middle of the night. Instead of sleeping, I'd build little "men" on the floor with my clothes, always color-coordinated right down to the socks (but really, this was the age of Garanimals clothing, so matching the hippo pants with the hippo shirts wasn't exactly algebra).

So, I've always been a little fanatical about my clothes. Of the two walk-in closets in our bedroom, I have the bigger one. If I spill a drop of coffee on my pants before work, I'm mentally ruined for the entire day, self-consciously trying to hide the stain when walking through the halls. And yes, I've thought extensively about what to wear to Vegas.

So there ya go, more about me that you never cared to know. Now I can get back to my mental volleyball match. This one's going five sets.